Parenting strategies I’ve been trying

​Feeling like my strategies with Miss Bee  are paying off. I’ve been using techniques from a book we were given a couple of years ago at school. One of the approaches I’ve been using is around the concept of Mindset and feedback. Rather than only describing what I see I also acknowledge her efforts rather than simply commenting. Sometimes it’s a quick comment “look at that big Lego tower!  You tried again until you made it the way you wanted”.

I’ve also been trying to emphasise “yet”. If she struggles with something advanced I will tell her you can’t do that yet,  but I let’s do it together.  One day you’ll be able to do it all by yourself.  If she can’t do something she wants I’ll encourage by saying try again. Now I hear her self talk saying “try again”.

Getting a toddler to listen to what you’re saying when they’re dealing with big emotions can be challenging. I’ve been trying to engage cooperation by using a combination of ideas in the book.  I acknowledge her feelings,  try to engage cooperation is difficult as some of the ideas are better suited to older children-for example she’s not exactly up to reading a note. But I do think strategies like giving information (briefly) or describing what I see work well on this age.  We can’t get in the car to go the park when you run off to play in the yard. I find binary choice works well with toddlers as they like choice. If choosing for example clothing I’ll offer two choices “would you like to wear your red top or blue top?”. 

I will try to state my expectations prior to entering a potentially challenging situation and restate during. “When we go outside to get in the car I want you to go straight to the gate”.  If she tries to run off I’ll remind by saying “gate now”. 

If she follows my direction I state what I see “I see Miss Bee listened. You’re at the gate ready to go to the park”.

Anyway… Toodler needs attention so this is part 1!

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