There are scary times in our life when we stand at a crossroad and wonder what the right move is.
Sometimes that cross road feels more like a cliff. You look down as far as you can see but the bottom is in mist. It’s ambiguous and kind of frightening. You stare, wondering if it looks more like waves crashing on rocks. Yet, that is the direction you know is right. The direction of risk, change and new horizons.
I stood somewhat precariously at the edge a long time. But you know what happens the longer you stand deciding. The decision just becomes harder. The leap more laboured.
In life I am definitely a thinker. I really like to look at problems from many angles. It’s tiring to look and look but not find a solution. It’s frustrating. It’s exhausting.
Reality is though NOT choosing is a choice. Being stagnant avoiding a problem while you examine it is a choice. A choice to remain in stress.
Today was the “pull off the bandaid” day. Today was leaping with lead shoes over the cliff into the uncertain abyss. Not knowing how the fall will end but knowing that even if it’s hard standing on the cliff was harder.
Right now I’m falling in slow motion. The fact that I’m no longer on the knife edge hasn’t quite sunk in.
I can plan for what I’ll do when I get there. I can pray it’s OK. Or I can just pause in this moment and be mindful of the soft wind rushing by and relish the fact I finally made the decision.
Makes me think of the Road not taken poen by Robert Frost. Except one road was one I was on and chose to leave.